The Memories We Make
by BekksRich
Summary: My first fanfic. Snow Queen friendship (it'll get there, maybe, sort of). Originally written as a one-shot but then my brain did a thing and I gave in. No real plot, just a collection of memories Regina shared with Snow during their time in the Enchanted Forest as her stepmother.
1. Nightmares

**AN: This is my first fanfic. I'm sorry if it's not very good. I'm certainly going to continue it as soon as I have free time to do so, because surely that cannot be the ending. x**

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You walked hastily across the vast space towards where the moonlight poured through a large window and onto her bed.

She had been crying out for you in her sleep, having nightmares again. A part of you thought she could sense your betrayal and you had shivered though the air was warm.

You softly shook the young girl awake, sighing at the loss of hearing her cries.

Innocence and misplaced trust were sketched across a soft face that you held loosely between your hands. You lightly placed a kiss to her forehead and she wrapped her small arms around your nightgown.

When your vision began to blur, you didn't understand why there were tears threatening to fall from your eyes. You tried to convince yourself back then, much like you do now, that your sudden display of emotion had been brought on by the thought of your upcoming victory and you ignored the dull ache in your heart.

When you pulled away from her, she looked up at you with the light of a thousand suns dancing in her eyes.

You intended to soothe her by touching her arm, but you hesitated, both of you silently knowing that your touches were too gentle for there to be any sincerity behind them.

She had looked up at you and smiled weakly, a deep sadness pushing away the twinkle in her eyes. As if she had known that you would rather hurt her than console her, she let her expression give way to a frown and slowly reclined back onto her pillow, letting her eyes drift shut. Your presence had seemed to comfort her, having seen no reason to fear you yet.

But that was just like her to trust the wrong people. Another mistake to have added to her rapidly expanding list.

You remember sighing beside her, watching her sleep for long minutes before brushing a lock of hair from her face so that you could have one last look before the rose on her cheeks would be drained forever.

Ambivalence washed over your skin and for a moment you had almost felt guilt, as if you were the one who had destroyed a life.

You swallowed whatever feelings you had that night before getting up from the girl's bed and retreating back to your own. No more thinking. You had already made your decision, just like she had made hers.

The next day, the huntsman was to bring you her heart, dripping with broken promises and good intentions. Surely you would feel better then.


	2. Plans

**AN: I promise I'll try to write a better chapter next time! I'm still just trying to learn how to transfer my thoughts from my mind to my computer without it looking like too much of a mess. Also, sorry for the delay in this chapter. Exam studying is relentlessly cruel. I swear there will one day be fluff injected into this story (because apparently it's forming into some sort of story now). Today is not that day. **

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She had been looking up to the sky and twirling around in the castle courtyard when you had next laid eyes on her.

The foolish girl tripped over a fallen apple and had curled herself into a tight ball before starting to sob quietly.

With an air of disinterest you had turned to walk away, but as you had done so a small voice with the fragility of a whisper grabbed for your attention.

"Regina?" It softly begged.

You froze, having wished to never further interact with her ever again in this life.

You had swirled back to face her, somehow finding it within yourself to muster a delicately convincing smile.

Your eyes gave you away, though. They always had.

One more day of pretending and you would be rid of this burden, you had thought to yourself. One more afternoon you would have to suffer.

You had glided over to where she still sat, your arms outstretched to wrap the child in a caring hug.

An unknown force had tugged at your chest at the embrace. You shrugged it off as nausea.

"Are you alright, child?" You had asked her, having to try slightly harder than usual to fit into the motherly role she had forced upon you.

The young girl sniffled and you had brushed a tear away from her warm cheek with your thumb. She had stopped crying by now and you had thought of it as such a pity – no other sound could bring you nearly as much joy as hearing Snow White in pain.

You pulled the girl to her feet and she had averted her eyes to the grey stones beneath her.

Cupping her chin, you had gracefully tilted her face up to meet your gaze.

The plastered smile had now come naturally to you, but your eyes continued to remain unkind as they bore into hers.

"How would you like to come with me this afternoon on my stroll through the forest?" You had suggested a little too eagerly, but the unsuspecting girl you still held by the chin mistook the offer as the friendly gesture it was disguised as.

An unmistakable gleam of excitement filled the young girl's eyes and you had felt a sharp twinge pierce your chest, painfully remembering having once had a similar expression grace your own features.

Once. That was before she had it taken from you forever. Ripped away just like a beating heart, plucked while it was still fresh.

The child quickly wrapped you in a tight hug as an answer and you had lightly squeezed her in return, reminiscent of the time you had saved her life.

You should have let her die on that horse.

It had taken all of your willpower not to guide your hands towards that pretty little neck of hers and snap it.

The violent thought had made you inhale sharply.

You silently questioned how you got like this, even though your mother had taught you better than to ask questions you already knew the answers to. The girl had made you this way.

Lost in your own broken memories, you hadn't noticed the tears spilling freely down your face until the young princess you were now gripping tightly looked up at you with concern.

"Are _you_ alright, Regina?" She was now the one pleading to know.

Your smile grew unbelievably wide, almost as evidently fake as your love for her father, as your red eyes stung from the tears.

But Snow was just a foolish child who had never learned the difference between fantasy and reality, and so her eyes only saw your smile as a sign of your growing love for her.

You could have told her every detail of your plan right up to the part where the huntsman dissects her heart like a toad and brings it to you as a trophy, and she would have probably still looked at you with those bright green eyes and that sickeningly sweet and undying affection she still has for you, because _god_ you must have _loved_ _her_ _so much_ to want to literally steal her heart.

You pulled her in closer to you so that your head rested above her shoulder, your voice cracking.

"I'm fine. I am just so thrilled that I get to spend such a pleasant day with you…"

The last words left your throat in a hoarse whisper, "…my dearest Snow."

All you can remember is the deafening beating of a heart drowning out your thoughts.


End file.
